Mixed Emo

I'm here at the airport lounge, about to board in an hour.  Too bad i can't use my cellphone here inside.  I overcharged my cell with $25.00 load but i unfortunately can't use it for telebabad, haha.  Oh well, i miss home.  

I thought being away for nearly 2 months would clear my mind from some emotional and intellectual smog (haha, whatever you might call it).  Guess what, it didn't.  I'm still as scattered-brain as ever.  I still have no concrete plans for my future.  I know, why should i even plan?  I know God is with me and He alone knows my path but i also need to do some life-checking, you know?  Two weeks ago i was so inspired to go home.  Now my senses are down again.  I'm scared to go home now.  Pray, pray, pray, i tell myself.   

Ahhhhh!  What will happen when  i go home?  I need to focus.  Focus. Focus.  But i'm fat.  Focus.  Focus.  Should i go home?  Focus. Focus.

I thank God for my loved ones who took care of me while i'm here in the U.S.   I also thank God for my classmate-friend Julie.  She's from China but she practically grew up in Singapore (of all places).  I also met his Korean boyfriend.  His name's David.  And this afternoon this couple  took me out for lunch.  We had Thai food.   

I'll definitely miss Julie.  She's my first non-filipino friend.  

Oh, i think we'll be boarding in a while.  I have to go.  When i get home i'll practice doing mini-mood boards.  Because in school my mood boards suck.  Last week, I promised myself that i'd start doing it.   I even asked Julie to lend me her gluestick so i could attach random pictures to the pages of my Moleskine.  But she forgot.  So i also forgot.  My bad.  

Okay i really have to go.  I miss Dean and Deluca.  I miss that cute bottle of fresh grapefruit juice from that shop.    I miss the yogurt parfait from the deli near our school.  

Okay bye. bye. bye.  Later!