My Letter For Tito Jun

Writing to someone is the hardest thing to do for me, especially when i try to tell someone how much he/she means to me. It just doesn't happen. I cannot put my feelings into words, real words.

When i found out that my beloved ninong-uncle is seriously ill, almost every relative of mine began posting words of love and goodbyes on facebook for my uncle Tito Jun. When i read some of these, i was encouraged to write mine. But after much contemplation staring at my macbook, i found no words to tell him but "i love you tito jun." I didn't know how to express my grief and my longing to be with him for the last time. Maybe because it's how i was brought up, my parents never said "i love you's" not even "take care's" to us. That's why all these cheesy words never come out of me when needed.

So instead, i'll try to thank Tito Jun through my blog... In my own way. I will start now..

Dearest Tito Jun,

If this letter will ever reach you, i'd like to say thank you for all the memories. I used to say that whenever i roll on my deodorant, i remember you. That's because you supply me annually with Dove Deodorants (For Sensitive Skin) because you know i couldn't find them here in the Philippines.

I also remember you whenever i soap my face, Tito. That's because you supply me with Clinique Mild Soap because you know how insane my skin is and you also know how cheap we could get it there in the U.S.

I remember you whenever i brush my teeth. That's because you know how vain i am with my teeth and how i always want them to be pearly white, so you supply me with Crest Whitening Toothpaste regularly. We could not find those here either.

So basically Tito, I remember you everyday, once when i roll on my deodorant, 3x when i brush my teeth, twice when i wash my face. I hope you understand how grave this is, how you will be missed. That's how you have become part of my life and i know that although these things might seem trivial to others, for me, these are my most memorable things that i will only attribute to you. You know that you don't actually have to give these things to me but you just love giving. You have been so generous to everyone around you. I love you Tito Jun.

You have been an inspiration to us your pamangkins in many different ways and i am certain that not one of us will ever forget you. You have been the best dad (our best second dad even) and we are so proud of your loving and talented kids. When things go sour, you're there to give us all a smile. We will surely miss all your lambings especially to your loving mom, Lola Mariet. You're our one and only Tito Pabling. We will miss you terribly. I love you, Tito.

Love,
Tinay